How to describe your ambition in two parts?
I want to explain my general ambition separately in two parts. Is the following sentence grammatically and literally correct? How about using "consist" as a verb for subject (ambition)? If it seems awkward, please suggest me a better sentence.
My ambition to make the world a better place to live was not restricted just to the environment, but rather consisted of participating in society to extend peace and friendship among people.
verbs expressions
edited Jan 2 at 22:05
J.R.♦
98.5k8126244
asked Jan 2 at 20:00
sasan taghadosisasan taghadosi
1429
add a comment |
I want to explain my general ambition separately in two parts. Is the following sentence grammatically and literally correct? How about using "consist" as a verb for subject (ambition)? If it seems awkward, please suggest me a better sentence.
My ambition to make the world a better place to live was not restricted just to the environment, but rather consisted of participating in society to extend peace and friendship among people.
verbs expressions
edited Jan 2 at 22:05
J.R.♦
98.5k8126244
asked Jan 2 at 20:00
sasan taghadosisasan taghadosi
1429
add a comment |
I want to explain my general ambition separately in two parts. Is the following sentence grammatically and literally correct? How about using "consist" as a verb for subject (ambition)? If it seems awkward, please suggest me a better sentence.
My ambition to make the world a better place to live was not restricted just to the environment, but rather consisted of participating in society to extend peace and friendship among people.
verbs expressions
edited Jan 2 at 22:05
J.R.♦
98.5k8126244
asked Jan 2 at 20:00
sasan taghadosisasan taghadosi
1429
I want to explain my general ambition separately in two parts. Is the following sentence grammatically and literally correct? How about using "consist" as a verb for subject (ambition)? If it seems awkward, please suggest me a better sentence.
My ambition to make the world a better place to live was not restricted just to the environment, but rather consisted of participating in society to extend peace and friendship among people.
verbs expressions
verbs expressions
edited Jan 2 at 22:05
J.R.♦
98.5k8126244
asked Jan 2 at 20:00
sasan taghadosisasan taghadosi
1429
edited Jan 2 at 22:05
J.R.♦
98.5k8126244
asked Jan 2 at 20:00
sasan taghadosisasan taghadosi
1429
edited Jan 2 at 22:05
J.R.♦
98.5k8126244
edited Jan 2 at 22:05
J.R.♦
98.5k8126244
edited Jan 2 at 22:05
J.R.♦
98.5k8126244
98.5k8126244
asked Jan 2 at 20:00
sasan taghadosisasan taghadosi
1429
asked Jan 2 at 20:00
sasan taghadosisasan taghadosi
1429
asked Jan 2 at 20:00
sasan taghadosisasan taghadosi
1429
1429
add a comment |
add a comment |
2 Answers
2
active
oldest
votes
Grammatically, your sentence is fine. It's light on content, though.
My ambition to make the world a better place
to live1 was not restricted just to just the environment, but rather consisted of participating in society to extend peace and friendship among people2.
"To live" can be omitted to reduce the length of the sentence. "To live" is implied along with all other activities we do here on Earth. "To live" also sounds a little repetitive coming so soon after "to make." This is purely style, though, and the next reader may disagree with me.
This sentence is understandable and grammatically correct but does not convey any meaningful message. It's essentially a long winded way of saying "I was nice to people." You should try being more specific about what you did.
answered Jan 2 at 20:27
rpeinhardtrpeinhardt
1,0349
add a comment |
Grammatically and in the use of "consist" it is correct. It is rather full of teenage optimism, but that is perhaps not a bad thing.
I assume this is for some kind of "personal statement" or similar. It is rather meaningless: I mean, I assume everyone wants things to be better; how are you different? Nearly everyone "participates in society". How exactly do you "extend peace"? As it stands it looks like "padding".
answered Jan 2 at 20:16
James KJames K
34.5k13887
you are right, I'm writing a SOP for a business school, but after this sentence, I wanted to explain how I would intend to do so. Now, due to your comment, I feel I'd better to be more specific and less teenagish. Thanks
– sasan taghadosi
Jan 2 at 20:38
add a comment |
Your Answer
StackExchange.ready(function() {
var channelOptions = {
tags: "".split(" "),
id: "481"
};
initTagRenderer("".split(" "), "".split(" "), channelOptions);
StackExchange.using("externalEditor", function() {
// Have to fire editor after snippets, if snippets enabled
if (StackExchange.settings.snippets.snippetsEnabled) {
StackExchange.using("snippets", function() {
createEditor();
});
}
else {
createEditor();
}
});
function createEditor() {
StackExchange.prepareEditor({
heartbeatType: 'answer',
autoActivateHeartbeat: false,
convertImagesToLinks: false,
noModals: true,
showLowRepImageUploadWarning: true,
reputationToPostImages: null,
bindNavPrevention: true,
postfix: "",
imageUploader: {
brandingHtml: "Powered by u003ca class="icon-imgur-white" href="https://imgur.com/"u003eu003c/au003e",
contentPolicyHtml: "User contributions licensed under u003ca href="https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/"u003ecc by-sa 3.0 with attribution requiredu003c/au003e u003ca href="https://stackoverflow.com/legal/content-policy"u003e(content policy)u003c/au003e",
allowUrls: true
},
noCode: true, onDemand: true,
discardSelector: ".discard-answer"
,immediatelyShowMarkdownHelp:true
});
}
});
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
StackExchange.ready(
function () {
StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2fell.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f191640%2fhow-to-describe-your-ambition-in-two-parts%23new-answer', 'question_page');
}
);
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
2 Answers
2
active
oldest
votes
2 Answers
2
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
Grammatically, your sentence is fine. It's light on content, though.
My ambition to make the world a better place
to live1 was not restricted just to just the environment, but rather consisted of participating in society to extend peace and friendship among people2.
"To live" can be omitted to reduce the length of the sentence. "To live" is implied along with all other activities we do here on Earth. "To live" also sounds a little repetitive coming so soon after "to make." This is purely style, though, and the next reader may disagree with me.
This sentence is understandable and grammatically correct but does not convey any meaningful message. It's essentially a long winded way of saying "I was nice to people." You should try being more specific about what you did.
answered Jan 2 at 20:27
rpeinhardtrpeinhardt
1,0349
add a comment |
Grammatically, your sentence is fine. It's light on content, though.
My ambition to make the world a better place
to live1 was not restricted just to just the environment, but rather consisted of participating in society to extend peace and friendship among people2.
"To live" can be omitted to reduce the length of the sentence. "To live" is implied along with all other activities we do here on Earth. "To live" also sounds a little repetitive coming so soon after "to make." This is purely style, though, and the next reader may disagree with me.
This sentence is understandable and grammatically correct but does not convey any meaningful message. It's essentially a long winded way of saying "I was nice to people." You should try being more specific about what you did.
answered Jan 2 at 20:27
rpeinhardtrpeinhardt
1,0349
add a comment |
Grammatically, your sentence is fine. It's light on content, though.
My ambition to make the world a better place
to live1 was not restricted just to just the environment, but rather consisted of participating in society to extend peace and friendship among people2.
"To live" can be omitted to reduce the length of the sentence. "To live" is implied along with all other activities we do here on Earth. "To live" also sounds a little repetitive coming so soon after "to make." This is purely style, though, and the next reader may disagree with me.
This sentence is understandable and grammatically correct but does not convey any meaningful message. It's essentially a long winded way of saying "I was nice to people." You should try being more specific about what you did.
answered Jan 2 at 20:27
rpeinhardtrpeinhardt
1,0349
Grammatically, your sentence is fine. It's light on content, though.
My ambition to make the world a better place
to live1 was not restricted just to just the environment, but rather consisted of participating in society to extend peace and friendship among people2.
"To live" can be omitted to reduce the length of the sentence. "To live" is implied along with all other activities we do here on Earth. "To live" also sounds a little repetitive coming so soon after "to make." This is purely style, though, and the next reader may disagree with me.
This sentence is understandable and grammatically correct but does not convey any meaningful message. It's essentially a long winded way of saying "I was nice to people." You should try being more specific about what you did.
answered Jan 2 at 20:27
rpeinhardtrpeinhardt
1,0349
answered Jan 2 at 20:27
rpeinhardtrpeinhardt
1,0349
answered Jan 2 at 20:27
rpeinhardtrpeinhardt
1,0349
answered Jan 2 at 20:27
rpeinhardtrpeinhardt
1,0349
1,0349
add a comment |
add a comment |
Grammatically and in the use of "consist" it is correct. It is rather full of teenage optimism, but that is perhaps not a bad thing.
I assume this is for some kind of "personal statement" or similar. It is rather meaningless: I mean, I assume everyone wants things to be better; how are you different? Nearly everyone "participates in society". How exactly do you "extend peace"? As it stands it looks like "padding".
answered Jan 2 at 20:16
James KJames K
34.5k13887
you are right, I'm writing a SOP for a business school, but after this sentence, I wanted to explain how I would intend to do so. Now, due to your comment, I feel I'd better to be more specific and less teenagish. Thanks
– sasan taghadosi
Jan 2 at 20:38
add a comment |
Grammatically and in the use of "consist" it is correct. It is rather full of teenage optimism, but that is perhaps not a bad thing.
I assume this is for some kind of "personal statement" or similar. It is rather meaningless: I mean, I assume everyone wants things to be better; how are you different? Nearly everyone "participates in society". How exactly do you "extend peace"? As it stands it looks like "padding".
answered Jan 2 at 20:16
James KJames K
34.5k13887
you are right, I'm writing a SOP for a business school, but after this sentence, I wanted to explain how I would intend to do so. Now, due to your comment, I feel I'd better to be more specific and less teenagish. Thanks
– sasan taghadosi
Jan 2 at 20:38
add a comment |
Grammatically and in the use of "consist" it is correct. It is rather full of teenage optimism, but that is perhaps not a bad thing.
I assume this is for some kind of "personal statement" or similar. It is rather meaningless: I mean, I assume everyone wants things to be better; how are you different? Nearly everyone "participates in society". How exactly do you "extend peace"? As it stands it looks like "padding".
answered Jan 2 at 20:16
James KJames K
34.5k13887
Grammatically and in the use of "consist" it is correct. It is rather full of teenage optimism, but that is perhaps not a bad thing.
I assume this is for some kind of "personal statement" or similar. It is rather meaningless: I mean, I assume everyone wants things to be better; how are you different? Nearly everyone "participates in society". How exactly do you "extend peace"? As it stands it looks like "padding".
answered Jan 2 at 20:16
James KJames K
34.5k13887
answered Jan 2 at 20:16
James KJames K
34.5k13887
answered Jan 2 at 20:16
James KJames K
34.5k13887
answered Jan 2 at 20:16
James KJames K
34.5k13887
34.5k13887
you are right, I'm writing a SOP for a business school, but after this sentence, I wanted to explain how I would intend to do so. Now, due to your comment, I feel I'd better to be more specific and less teenagish. Thanks
– sasan taghadosi
Jan 2 at 20:38
add a comment |
you are right, I'm writing a SOP for a business school, but after this sentence, I wanted to explain how I would intend to do so. Now, due to your comment, I feel I'd better to be more specific and less teenagish. Thanks
– sasan taghadosi
Jan 2 at 20:38
you are right, I'm writing a SOP for a business school, but after this sentence, I wanted to explain how I would intend to do so. Now, due to your comment, I feel I'd better to be more specific and less teenagish. Thanks
– sasan taghadosi
Jan 2 at 20:38
you are right, I'm writing a SOP for a business school, but after this sentence, I wanted to explain how I would intend to do so. Now, due to your comment, I feel I'd better to be more specific and less teenagish. Thanks
– sasan taghadosi
Jan 2 at 20:38
add a comment |
Thanks for contributing an answer to English Language Learners Stack Exchange!
- Please be sure to answer the question. Provide details and share your research!
But avoid …
- Asking for help, clarification, or responding to other answers.
- Making statements based on opinion; back them up with references or personal experience.
To learn more, see our tips on writing great answers.
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
StackExchange.ready(
function () {
StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2fell.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f191640%2fhow-to-describe-your-ambition-in-two-parts%23new-answer', 'question_page');
}
);
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
